Just My Imagination
by arwen2117
Summary: Spring is in the air, when a girl's heart turns lightly to love's past. CJToby


Just My Imagination  
  
Summary: Spring is in the air, and it is a time when a person's heart turns lightly love past and love lost.  
  
Disclaimer: These characters are not mine, rather Aaron Sorkin's. I just try to do them justice. This is my first try at writing, so give me some slack, or some feedback, or even some grief. This doesn't really fit into any particular time continuum of the show, but if I had to put it somewhere I would say somewhere in the either Season 2 or 3.  
  
"I love spring in D.C. with the cherry blossoms blooming. The fragrance makes me so. happy. Yes, spring is the best time of year," she muttered to no one in particular but felt the need to say anyway.  
  
"When a girl's heart turns lightly to love." This time her voice did not have that happy lilt that could have previously been heard.  
  
It had been many years since her heart had turn to anything besides the polls and the current incident that she needed to straighten out with the press. She thought longingly back to a time when she had the time and inclination to seek out a significant other. It was right after she had completed her Master's at Berkeley. It had been spring then too. But instead of the smell of cherry blossoms, the air had been filled with the smell of the sea from San Francisco Bay.  
  
She had seen him around campus a few times. It wasn't hard to miss him; he stood out among the students who wore bright colored T-shirts, shorts, and sandals. For him, a bright color was navy. He would wear dark slacks and button-down shirt with a tie every day. They had finally met at a cocktail party for the political science department. He was visiting from New York to take a few classes at Berkeley while getting his Doctorate in political theory of U.S. foreign and domestic affairs. They had instantly hit it off because of their common aspiration: to work in the White House. Soon they were meeting at least three times a week to discuss current world issues and other newsworthy topics. After a few months, the conversation had turned to more personal matters.  
  
"No, I'm not seeing anyone. I haven't really found someone that understands my goals. They hear 'White House' and before I know it, then seat across from me is empty," she said.  
  
"I know how that feels. I haven't dated anyone in a few years myself. I think people are scared to talk to me. You know, politics and all," he replied.  
  
"I think most people think of politics as a foreign language that only brainaics can understand."  
  
"Yeah, I know. I guess that means that you and I speak the same language."  
  
"Yeah I guess you're right. Funny, the one person I really enjoy talking to and he lives on the other side of the country."  
  
His face and heart fell a little bit after hearing the words leave her lips. But he quickly recovered, so she wouldn't notice. His mind flashed to the end of the summer when he would have to go back to New York in order to give his dissertation. And she would go off somewhere to start work with her degree in hand. Destiny always seems to be plotting against him. But he decided to make the most of the time they had together.  
  
"So.since the two of us aren't really seeing anyone.and we both enjoy each other's company, I was wondering if you would like to go out to dinner or something sometime?" he let the words tumble out while he turned pink.  
  
"Are you asking me out?"  
  
"Yes," he said softly.  
  
"I would love to, but let's not get too serious, okay? Just a summer fling, right?"  
  
"Of course. Wouldn't have it any other way," He said, finally regaining his composure and straightening his tie.  
  
Throughout the next few months, they became almost inseparable. They went to piano bars, comedy clubs, but mostly coffee houses where they could argue and debate into the wee hours of the morning. Coffee black for him and mint tea for her. They would argue about everything under the sun from the Middle East to the designated hitter. Most of the time these heated discussions would normally stay on polite terms, but on occasion there would be yelling, name calling, and tears. But they would quickly fade away with kisses and apologies. And at the end of each night, they would end up in each other's arms at either his or her apartment. It had all felt like a fairytale to her. Finally, her Prince Charming had rode in on his white steed. Unfortunately, unlike most fairytales, this one was on a timetable and soon enough, summer ended and their last day together arrived.  
  
He decided to make their last evening together special. They went to a Woody Allen film festival. They both laughed at all the funny parts and agreed that Woody was by far the most neurotic person they could think of. Once the credits for What's Up Tiger Lily? ran, they headed to an Italian place tucked back on a street corner. It was a hole in the wall, but they made the best manicotti in San Francisco. After two huge plates of spaghetti and a bottle of red wine, they left to walk through a park on the way to dessert, which was at a surprise destination. She had not expected where he took her: an authentic '50s soda shop. He remembered how much she loved this period of history with the poodle skirts, greasers, and easier times. It was the sweetest thing anyone had done for her in a long time. They ordered malts and sat in a corner booth not far from the jukebox and a small dance floor. They listened to the oldies and watched the couples dance. Then just as they had almost finished their malts, the song came on the jukebox.  
  
"It was just my imagination, yeah, running away with me."  
  
He smiled and held his hand out to lead her onto the floor. As they swayed to the music, tears welled up in her eyes.  
  
"I'm never going to see you again, am I?" she said with a wavering voice.  
  
"I really don't know, but I'd like to think that destiny has something more in store for us than just one summer."  
  
And with that, silence fell upon the couple. She put her head against his shoulder, and they swayed to the music once again. Neither of them knew what the future held for them and neither saw the tears in the other's eyes that night.  
  
After that night, they both had gone their separate ways. They ended working on campaigns on the local level in their respective regions, her in L.A. and him in New York. Then one day, quite out of the blue, destiny took a turn. Yes, she had been embarrassed when she fell into the pool, and he was rather amused at her worries about clingy clothes, given their history. But they had managed to pull it together in the end and now they worked in the White House at the pleasure of a man that they both respected and revered. Once inauguration had passed, they both had made an agreement to leave the past where it was and go on with a professional relationship. But old feelings die hard and she found herself wondering if destiny had brought them back together just like he said it would.  
  
*** "CJ!" the voice bellowed through the press office.  
  
Just what she wanted to hear in the morning, that voice screaming her name.  
  
"Toby, what do you say, what do you do?", trying to lighten the mood.  
  
"I say that you should have been here 15 minutes ago and I don't do well," he replied curtly.  
  
"I was smelling the cherry blossoms. You know it's spring outside, right?" trying once again to make him laugh or at least, smile.  
  
"Yeah, I know. My allergies are just about killing me."  
  
"Okay", realizing that her good mood was lost on him, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Well, it seems that one of the junior members of the Senate is deciding to hold out on the death tax bill coming through. But he has managed to collect a small contingent of Senators to agree with him. And now, the press has wind of it, no doubt by that peon's press office. So what could have solved relatively quickly has now become a media circus."  
  
"So you need me to what? Tame lions? Spin plates?"  
  
A little smile crept across his face, but quickly disappeared. "No, I need you to tame the press corps. Tell them that this bill is an important piece.you know, do your magic."  
  
"Oh I see, I'm just the side show. Well then, off I go to tame the man eaters."  
  
Another smile. As she turned to leave, he said, "Oh, don't forget about the dinner tonight honoring the new president of Spain."  
  
"I'll be there with bells on at 7 sharp. Brought my dress with me and everything."  
  
The day moved at a breakneck pace. She managed fix the problem with press corps and the junior senator with relative ease. And with a few well- placed calls by Toby and Josh, the bill was back on its way to being passed and sent up to the White House. She even managed to get a full lid on the press by 6 p.m., which gave her plenty of time to get ready for the dinner. As she stepped out of her office to head down to the festivities, she bumped into none other than him. He was dressed in a classic tux as always. She was wearing a beautiful blue satin sheath. Nothing too fancy, but classic and timeless just the same. He turned to see her leaving, smiled, and walked to catch up with her.  
  
"You look great, CJ. That dress is amazing."  
  
"Thanks. You're looking pretty good yourself in your penguin suit."  
  
They both laughed, then he held his arm out for her to take and they walked down to the ballroom where the dinner was being held arm in arm. The evening was enchanting with great food, great music, and great conversation. With the potential crisis up on the Hill averted, the conversation was light-hearted with talk of who would be going to the Series that year and how college basketball turned out. As the evening grew longer, people stopped talking and took advantage of the music of the band and started to dance. CJ and Toby were sitting across from each other at one of the round tables not far from the dance floor. CJ was talking to some Spaniard who was obsessed with the Beach Boys and was proceeding to pump her for information about California. Toby, was in a heated discussion with Josh about how the Yankees were going to cream the Mets should it come down to a Subway Series. Suddenly, a familiar song filtered through the air and their eyes met across the table. He got up and held his hand out just like he had all those years ago in that soda shop. And they got up and slowly swayed to music.  
  
"Wow, déjà vu," she said.  
  
"Yes. Yes it is," he replied.  
  
"You know all those years ago. I thought we would end up together. That you would come back or I would go out to New York. But I never expected things to turn out the way that they did."  
  
"I know what you mean. But don't you think things turned out for the best?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, I guess it did," she said, trying to sound upbeat, but inside she was heartbroken.  
  
How could he just think that this was the best thing for us. She felt the tears filling up in her eyes. It was like getting her heart ripped out of her chest again, but this time it hurt even more because she knew that he wasn't feeling the same way. The tears started to burn and she buried her head into him to hide the tears. But he saw when she thought she had hid them, suddenly he realized that all those feelings that he had thought were one-sided were actually mutual. Destiny had given them another chance, he was going to make damn sure that this time he didn't let it slip away like he had back in that soda shop.  
  
After the dinner was over, they went back to their offices to collect their belongings and started to head out. He made sure that he caught up with her before she had a chance to slip out. He suggested that they go for a walk before heading home. They started to walk and soon ended up by the cherry blossoms lining the river. It was so peaceful and she was right, it was spring. He saw her shiver slightly at the cool breeze that was blowing by. The night had turned colder, and she had left her coat at home that morning. He offered her his tuxedo coat and slipped it over her shoulders.  
  
"You know, you're right. The blossoms really are beautiful," he said, already starting to get nervous.  
  
"Yes, they are. They always remind me that winter is never eternal and that the ice will always thaw to reveal the flowers every spring."  
  
"All the flowers need is time and patience and then their beauty will be there for everyone to enjoy."  
  
"Very true."  
  
"And sometimes, people just need time to see that the mistakes that they have made are not frozen in time," he said, timidly after screwing up his courage  
  
"What are you saying, Toby?"  
  
"I'm saying that that night in the soda shop broke my heart. I thought I was over it when I married Andy, but now I see that I never really recovered from having to leave you that night. I never told you this, but that night I went home and cried over the thought of never seeing you again."  
  
"I cried too. I never really got over you , Toby. And I thought I would be okay when we started working together for Bartlet but once we got passed the first year, the old feelings came back. But it seemed clear that you had put all of our history into the past, and after tonight when you said it was for the best that we never got together again; it felt like my heart had been broken all over again," she said teary-eyed.  
  
"Well now that we know that these feelings are mutual, what are we going to do?" he asked.  
  
"I don't know. But we can't go back to the way things were, and I don't want to get my heart broken for a third time. So Toby, if you're not serious about this, then just walk away now."  
  
"I'll show you exactly how serious I am."  
  
And with that he proceeded to get down on one knee, take her hand and said, "Claudia Jean Cregg, I let you go all those years ago which was a mistake, and it would be even a greater mistake for me to allow you to slip through my fingers a second time. I know that this seems sudden, but if you look into your heart you'll see that this is actually long overdue. CJ, will you do me the honor of marrying me?"  
  
Instead of saying "yes" she pulled him up to a standing position and kissed him passionately. They parted and he said, "So I take that as 'yes' right?"  
  
"Yes, of course I will marry you, silly."  
  
They hugged and kissed some more and then headed back to her place to celebrate since it was closer. They decided to keep it to themselves for a while and that they would go ring shopping that weekend. They ended up falling asleep in each other's arms that night.  
  
***  
  
She woke up that morning to the clock radio. She turned over expecting to see him lying next her, but her bed was empty. It had just been a dream. All those feelings and emotions were really doing a number on her mind and had decided to manifest themselves as a dream. She sighed, realizing that her feelings for him would never be returned. As she went to turn to the radio off before heading into shower, the song, "Just My Imagination" came on. She turned the volume up and shed a solitary tear for that summer and then headed off to get ready for another day.  
  
Across town, a man was dressing when a familiar song came on the radio. He thought back to a summer when he had been happy and carefree. He started to tear and then thought about his feelings towards her and wondered if they would ever be returned. As the song ended and the song, "Stay" came on, two radios were clicked off, and two people headed off to the White House a little more heavy-hearted than the day before.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED. 


End file.
